Divorce is a time of significant change for children. During this time, they depend on their parents to keep things as stable as possible. While this is challenging enough in even the best case, it’s even more difficult when one parent is an addict.
One of the most difficult things for you, as the non-addict parent, might be having to cope with the helter-skelter ways that often come with addiction. This can significantly impact the children because they won’t have the consistency they need.
Provide emotional support and open communication
Children who are dealing with a person with an addiction as a parent need to have emotional support from their other parent. There may be times when they start to internalize the problems and try to share the blame for the addiction with the addict parent. At that point, you may need to step in and teach them about addiction and what factors may play a role in it.
Encourage their relationship with the addict parent
The relationship between a child and an addict parent might not look like a traditional relationship. Because of this, you may have to encourage your children to embrace the good times they have with their parents. This may be done by setting realistic expectations about what things may be like with the other parent.
Avoid badmouthing your ex
Even when you don’t like what your ex is doing, avoid badmouthing them to your children. Discuss issues directly with your ex, but try to find a time when they’re sober.
If issues are causing danger or safety issues, it might be necessary to address those in court. Working with someone familiar with custody with an addict may be beneficial in these cases.